


Home Is The Sailor

by Esgalnen



Category: Magnum P.I. (TV 1980)
Genre: Capsized, Courage, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Friendship, Gen, Hawaii, Hurt/Comfort, Injury, Lost in the Ocean, Other, Recovery, Rescue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-01
Updated: 2020-10-01
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:20:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 6,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26754952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Esgalnen/pseuds/Esgalnen
Summary: This story is set after the episode ‘Home From The Sea’ and it occurred to me that Magnum would need some care afterwards after having been in the ocean for almost twenty-four hours. I have tried to stay true to the characters and to the events depicted in the original episode. Dr Zoe Walker is my own creation.  This story was written for fun and not for profit.  I have no money, please don’t sue.
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

Home Is The Sailor

_R. L. S._

_Home is the sailor, home from sea:_   
_Her far-borne canvas furled,_   
_The ship pours shining on the quay_   
_The plunder of the world._

_Home is the hunter from the hill:_   
_Fast in the boundless snare_   
_All flesh lies taken at his will_   
_And every fowl of air._

_'Tis evening on the moorland free,_   
_The starlit wave is still:_   
_Home is the sailor from the sea,_   
_The hunter from the hill._

_A. E. Housman_

Zoe was finishing up the stitching on the young lieutenant’s leg when she heard a familiar person clearing their throat behind her. Smiling brightly at the young woman, she nodded to one of the nurses, “Put a dressing on that, and you-” she stared at the young woman lying on the bed, “keep the injury dry and I want to see you next week – all right?”  
Turning she stripped off her gloves and smiled at the man standing hesitantly beside the Reception Desk, “Major! What a pleasant surprise!”  
“Captain,” the irritation in the voice was unmistakable, “please, don’t call me Major.”  
“Fair enough,” Zoe smiled, “what can I do for you, Sir?”  
If possible the scowl intensified, but Higgins merely cleared his throat and said, “I’m aware that this sounds preposterous, but I believe that a colleague of mine, Thomas Magnum is in trouble.”  
“Have you any evidence of this?” Zoe asked quietly.  
“No,” Higgins shook his head, “just a feeling that won’t go away. Suppose you’ll tell me I’m an idiot.”  
Zoe looked thoughtful, a frown creasing the skin between her eyebrows, “No, I don’t think so. One should always listen to this little ‘tickle’ that tells you something is wrong. Why do you think something’s happened to this friend of yours?”  
“I don’t know,” Higgins shrugged, “I have no evidence for it. Magnum always goes out to be alone on this day. A lot of bad memories. And he comes back early evening, exhausted but fine – so why I have this premonition that something’s happened is beyond me.”  
“I would never discount such premonitions,” Zoe replied, “is that why you’re here? You need my help?”  
“I do,” Higgins replied, “if Magnum has got himself into difficulties, I’m going to need a physician. I can think of no one who would be more qualified to be my second.”  
“When did he leave?”  
“Probably about half past three this afternoon,” Higgins replied.  
“And you haven’t seen him since?” Zoe frowned, “maybe your premonition is not unfounded. What do you think has happened?”  
“I don’t know,” Higgins admitted, “it’s 2200 hours now, what do you think happened?”  
“Well that’s the question,” Zoe replied, “what do you want me to do, Major?”  
“If I can arrange for a Search and Rescue tomorrow morning will you come with me?”  
“If you wish it,” Zoe replied.  
“I do,” Higgins replied, “I may need someone of your calibre.”  
“Flattery will get you everywhere, Major,” Zoe replied, a wry grin curling the lips. “Give me a couple of minutes to sign out and then I’m all yours.”  
Ten minutes later both of them were climbing into the car, “We’ll head back to the house first and I’ll make a report to the Hawaii Police and alert Search and Rescue. We’ve got a long night ahead of us. We’ll go to see T. C. tomorrow morning. He’s got a helicopter, takes people on trips around the islands.”  
“And he’ll believe you?” Zoe raised a dark eyebrow and to her surprise Higgins laughed.  
“I don’t know,” Higgins replied, “but they served together so I’m hoping that if I say that I believe that Magnum is in danger he’ll do as I ask.”  
“Fair enough,” Zoe replied, “have you a Plan B?”  
Higgins grimaced and Zoe decided not to push it. The dogs came running up to her as Higgins stopped the car and Zoe knelt to stroke the dogs’ heads, both Dobermanns swarmed over her, whining and licking until Higgins said, “Off, boys!”  
Zoe stood up to go into the house, Higgins held open the door and as Zoe stepped into the lounge she felt two cold noses pressing against the back of her calves.  
“I think you’ve made some new friends,” Higgins said, looking down into four bright eyes and two lolling pink tongues.  
“They just hope I’m carrying treats,” Zoe replied, as she followed Higgins into his study.  
“Let me notify the authorities,” Higgins said, lifting the telephone receiver. “Then we’ll discuss the next stage.”  
When he’d made the telephone calls, Higgins sat back and ran a weary hand across his face, “Search & Rescue are on full alert. The police have put an APB out for anyone with Magnum’s description. We’ll go down and see T.C. tomorrow morning.”  
“I’ll go and pack a Medical Bag,” Zoe replied, “and then we should eat, and try to get some rest.”  
Higgins nodded, “Good idea, Dr Walker, I’ll go and organize supper.”  
Afterwards, Zoe’s one regret was that she couldn’t enjoy dinner, it was a beautiful piece of fish and while both of them forced themselves to consume something, every mouthful tasted like sawdust. Higgins showed her to her room and said, “Will you be able to sleep?”  
“I shall do my best,” Zoe replied, “you, Major?”  
“Yes.” Higgins replied, raising a dark eyebrow, “I shall try.”  
Just as the sun began peeking over the horizon, they climbed into Higgins’ car and drove to the airfield.  
T.C. was cleaning the side of the brightly painted helicopter when the car stopped. Higgins clambered out of the car, and picking up her medical bag Zoe followed suit. T.C. turned as they approached, “Higgy-Baby!” He said, “what brings you out here? You want a ride around the islands?”  
“T.C.,” Higgins began, “this is going to sound ridiculous, but I’ve been having really strange misgivings about Magnum-”  
T.C. blenched and stepped back, his shoulder hitting the door of the helicopter, “You too,” he muttered, “I thought I was the only one.”  
“What about Rick?” Higgins asked urgently.  
“He’s taken a lady friend out on the King Kamehameha II,” T.C. replied, “I’ve not heard anything from him-”  
“Can you get us out there?” Zoe asked urgently, “I’m beginning to get a bad feeling about this.”  
“Yes. Me too.” T.C. replied, “you’d better get a life jacket on Higgins, and bring a float.”  
Ever afterwards, Zoe would never forget that wild helicopter ride. T.C. had contacted Rick by radio once they were airborne and when he’d confirmed that he too had been experiencing some bad vibes throughout the entire night, Zoe felt her heart sink, Rick had mentioned something about dropping the anchor on his yacht despite his girlfriend’s desire to travel on he said he felt as though he was meant to stay exactly where he was. “We’ll head for the yacht first,” Zoe told T.C., “and go on from there.”  
As the helicopter flew across the stretch of water towards the vessel, Higgins spotted the flailing figure, “My God,” was all he said, “get me down there.”  
Zoe watched as making sure his life jacket was securely fastened Higgins opened the door and then fighting the buffeting wind hauled himself out onto the landing gear, his right hand gripping the float, he half turned and grinned at Zoe, all flashing eyes and teeth. She gave him a quick nod and then he was gone and she was scrambling across the seat to pull the door closed.  
“We’d better get you on the yacht,” was all T.C. said as he turned the helicopter towards the King Kamehameha II. He half turned towards her, “I’ll hover above the roof, can you jump?”  
“Yes.” Zoe nodded, “can you arrange an ambulance Mr Calvin?”  
“Certainly Ma’am,” T.C. gave a quick nod and then Zoe was forcing the door open to drop her medical bag on the deck and then she was stepping out onto the landing gear, giving T.C. one last wolfish grin she dropped. Moving swiftly to the stern she saw Higgins pulling an unresponsive Magnum towards the boat. Rick was on the transom helping Higgins as they lifted a semiconscious Magnum onto the boat. Zoe gave them a quick nod of thanks and then said, “Better bring him in here,” she turned and walked through to the main cabin.  
Rick and Higgins carried their friend into the main cabin, Magnum’s head was lolling and he was barely conscious, “Put him on the sofa,” Zoe ordered, “and can someone get me some blankets?”  
Solicitously Rick tucked a pillow beneath Magnum’s head. Picking up her medical bag, Zoe walked across to the almost unconscious figure and bent over the semiconscious figure, “Hey,” she said gently tapping his shoulder, “let me have a look at you.”  
A tired smile touched the edges of Magnum’s mouth and he managed to murmur, “I held on, Dad, I held on.”  
“You did indeed,” Zoe replied compassionately, “gentlemen, if you’ll help me turn onto his side?”  
“What are you going to do?” Rick asked.  
“Muscle relaxant,” Zoe replied as she filled a syringe, “it’ll help.” She swabbed Magnum’s thigh and then injected the contents, Higgins helped her roll Magnum onto his back again.  
At that moment Rick came through from one of the other cabins, “I couldn’t find any Emergency blankets,” he said, “but I brought a couple of duvets.”  
“That’s great,” Zoe smiled, “Mr Wright, if you could contact the Port Authority and make sure an ambulance is standing by?”  
“I’ll do that,” Higgins interjected.  
Rick nodded and then she and Higgins were tucking the quilts around Magnum’s supine figure. Zoe took a penlight out of her pocket and laying a hand on Magnum’s head said gently, “Open your eyes, Thomas. I just need to check your pupils.”  
Magnum screwed open his eyes and winced slightly as Zoe flashed the light into each of his eyes, “How you feeling?” She asked gently, he managed a weary smile at the young woman standing at his side, “Who-who are you?”  
“Dr Zoe Walker,” she replied. She looked across into the two concerned faces of Higgins and Rick and said gently, “I think he just needs rest.”  
“Hey,” the man lying on the sofa murmured, “will you stay with me?” The woman nodded, just as Magnum felt his aching muscles begin to ease as whatever had been in the syringe began to take effect.  
“As you wish,” Zoe replied, gently she took Magnum’s pulse. Tucking his arm beneath the quilt she turned to find herself face to face with Rick, “I’m not sure I was needed,” she said quietly.  
“One should always be prepared, Dr Walker, don’t you agree?” Higgins had suddenly appeared as if from nowhere, “I agree that perhaps you weren’t required – but just think of the consequences if you had been needed and we hadn’t had a Doctor on call, besides which I think I will need your assistance once we get Mr Magnum back to the estate.” Higgins turned to Rick and smiled tautly, tension still evident in every line of his body, “my thanks for letting me use your Radio, Mr Wright.”  
As requested, an ambulance was waiting for them when the yacht docked and a deeply unconscious Magnum was carefully carried down the gangplank and eased into the back of it, Higgins and Dr Walker climbing in after the paramedics. Just before she stepped into the vehicle, Zoe turned to Rick and smiled, “I’ll let you and T.C. know how he’s doing,” she promised.


	2. Back At 'Robin's Nest'

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Settled back into Robin's Nest, Magnum's recovery begins.

Back At ‘Robin’s Nest’

Magnum jerked awake suddenly, sweat drenching his body. _Where the hell was he?_ Frantically he looked around, he didn’t recognise this space, wiping his arm across his face he threw his legs over the side of the bed and bit back a groan as his muscles protested. Struggling to stand up he had to hold onto the headboard as the room spun. As he began to walk down the corridor it began to twist wildly. He leaned against the wall closing his eyes waiting for his head to stop spinning.

A cool hand touched his arm and a gentle voice said “Thomas? Magnum? You shouldn’t be out of bed.”

From somewhere Magnum managed to dredge up the semblance of a smile before the world spun again. His next impression was of lying on his back staring up at the ceiling. A gentle hand took his own and the same voice said, “Magnum, can we get you back to bed?”

He slewed his head round to stare up into her eyes, licking his lips he managed to force words past his numb lips, “No, no, can’t go back-”

She squeezed his hand again and said softly, “Shall I make you comfortable here?”

He managed a weak nod in reply and felt her thumb stroking the back of his hand, “Go to sleep, I promise I will not move you.” The last thing he remembered clearly was her tucking something beneath his head before the world slid sideways dropping him off the edge. He retained scattered images of the rest of the day. Two people gently lifting him onto a mattress; sheets and blankets being tucked around him. He had the impression of a soft hand beneath his neck, offering small sips of water, a hand holding his own and a gentle voice keeping him grounded before he finally drifted into a deep sleep.

He regained consciousness slowly, blinking he stared up at the ceiling again and then slowly turned his head. A young woman was asleep on another mattress next to him. Snuggled up to her were the dark, lithe forms of two Doberman Pinschers. Magnum frowned, “Apollo? Zeus?”

Both dogs’ heads went up and they bounded across to the supine man, their stubby tails wagging furiously. Exhausted as he was, Magnum managed to pet the animals. He was just pushing a cold, wet nose away from his face when a clear, light voice spoke, “Apollo! Zeus! Down!” Both dogs dropped to their haunches, mouths open, long pink tongues hanging out. Slowly he turned his head to stare up into winter grey eyes and the face of a familiar young woman, Tentatively he reached up a hand, staring at her as if she was a fragile soap bubble. “I know you-” he breathed, “I saw you on the boat – thought you were a dream-”

“My name is Zoe,” she said again, “Dr Zoe Walker.”

Magnum managed a wan smile, a memory flickering like fish at the bottom of the pond. “You examined me when they got me aboard Rick’s boat-”

Zoe nodded, “Do you remember what you said?”

Magnum’s forehead crinkled and he murmured, “My father-” he stopped and ran a trembling hand across his face. “I ache all over-”

Zoe smiled, “I’m not surprised. Do you want to stay here or shall I get Higgins and we’ll help you back to bed.”

Magnum frowned again, “Don’t know, can’t think-” and then his eyes had fluttered closed and he was asleep again. Zoe checked his vitals and then satisfied that he was just asleep; sat back and wiped the back of her hand across her forehead. The two dogs, now lying on the second mattress, lifted their heads and whined. Zoe looked across at them, “He’ll be all right,” she assured them, “he’s just sleeping.”

“Dr Walker,” she turned to see Higgins standing in the doorway.

“Sir,” she rose to her feet, “how can I help?”

“How is Mr Magnum?”

“He woke up about five minutes ago, he wasn’t particularly coherent, but I suspect that’s just exhaustion.”

Higgins stared at the sleeping man and then sighed, running a hand across his face he asked,, “Can I get you anything?”

“A cup of coffee would be nice,” Zoe smiled, “I’d rather stay here if you don’t mind. I think he’ll settle better if someone was with him.”

Higgins nodded and then said, “It would be my pleasure. Cream and sugar?”

“Just cream please,” Zoe smiled, “thank you, Major.”

“Just Higgins,” Higgins replied, and then Zoe was alone again. She took Magnum’s hand and watched the strong face. Higgins brought the mug of coffee and a small plate with some _petits fours_ on it. Zoe looked up surprised and Higgins said, “Don’t let the dogs’ steal any of your treats.”

“No, Major,” Zoe promised.

Higgins scowled at her and shook his head, exasperated. Zoe managed a sheepish smile and carefully sipped her coffee.

Magnum awoke slowly. At first he still couldn’t work out where he was, although scattered images meandered through his head. He vaguely remembered staring up into a young woman’s face, a duvet tucked around him. He had scattered memories of awakening and panicking as he did not recognise his surroundings. Slowly he turned his head to stare at the young woman kneeling beside the mattress her nose buried in a book. The two Dobermans lying either side of her lifted their heads. The woman looked up and a slow smile crept up her face, “Good evening, Mr Magnum.”

He frowned, trying to place young woman, and then looked around, “I was out on the ocean – my skiff overturned – I was swept away-” he swallowed hard.

“It’s all right. Your friends got you in time.”

Magnum nodded, “Kept hearing my father’s voice; telling me to hold on.” A sad smile touched his lips, “suppose you think I’m an idiot.”

Zoe smiled and said gently, “No, I don’t believe so, Mr Magnum. I think your father never left your side throughout your ordeal.”

Magnum’s eyes filled with tears and he turned his face away so that she wouldn’t see him cry. Her hand tightened on his and she continued brightly, “I realise you must still be exhausted but can we get you back to bed? I think you’d be more comfortable.”

Magnum swallowed and nodded. Zoe rose smoothly to her feet and slipped out of the corridor. When she returned it was with Higgins and another two men in the white uniforms of nurses. Magnum was lifted as though he was a child and assisted back to the large bed. Zoe pulled the covers back and Magnum was helped into it. Zoe sat down on it and took his hand, “Your muscles must be sore. My advice would be to take it easy for the next day or so and then start moving around slowly. I can arrange for a masseuse to come and work the kinks out if you wish.”

“A massage?” A dark enquiring eyebrow was lifted and Zoe had to suppress a laugh.

“Well only if you want one,” Zoe grinned, “it’s just an option, Mr Magnum. But you are going to take it easy for the rest of today and for the next couple of days.”

Magnum nodded and frowned, “I don’t recognise the room. Aren’t you going to send me back to the Den?”

“Dr Walker thought that we should bring you into the main house,” Higgins said, “that way we felt we could keep an eye on you.”

“You?” Magnum asked and was rewarded with a nod from Zoe. “I see.”

“Would you like something to eat?” Zoe asked softly.

Magnum nodded, “That’d be great,” he said, “would you join me?”

“If Major Higgins thinks it’ll be all right then I’d love to.” Zoe replied.

“It would be my pleasure, Zoe,” Higgins replied.

“Would you like some help?” She asked, “now we’ve persuaded this incorrigible to stay put?”

“No, I think I’d rather you stayed with him,” Higgins replied, “he seems calmer when you’re here.”

“Ah, flattery will get you everywhere, Major.”

“Oh I do hope so, Captain,” Higgins replied. “So, what’ll it be?”

“Well, if kitchen can stretch to it, I’d love a steak sandwich.”

“I think we can manage that,” Higgins smiled, “Magnum?”

“Steak sandwich sounds great,” Magnum replied.

“Drinks?” Higgins enquired.

“Coffee I think,” Zoe smiled, “is that all right?”

“It’ll be a pleasure, Captain,” Higgins smiled.

Zoe grinned in reply and raised two fingers to her temple in a half salute. Higgins gave her a wry look and then they were alone.

“Captain?” Magnum queried.

“Army reserves,” Zoe replied, “I was regular army for five years and then reserves for these past two.”

Magnum closed his eyes and relaxed back into the pillows, “I think I owe you my life,” he murmured.

“No, not really,” Zoe responded, “you’re just exhausted and you’ve had a somewhat disturbing experience. That’s going to need some re-assessment.”

“Do you really think my father was with me?” Magnum asked, his eyes fixed on hers.

“It doesn’t matter what I think,” Zoe replied carefully, “it only matters what you think. And if you believe that your father’s presence helped keep you afloat, who am I to criticise?”

Magnum found himself blinking away furious tears again, when he could speak he looked up at Zoe, “Get right to the crux of things don’t you, Dr Walker?”

“Well as Shakespeare wrote, ‘There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.’ I do not discount anything, Mr Magnum.”

A wry smile touched Magnum’s lips, “Most people would say I was crazy,” he replied.

“I’m _not_ most people,” Zoe responded.

“No, I can see that.” A smile touched Magnum strong lips, but didn’t quite reach his eyes, a shudder ran through the strong frame.

Zoe squeezed his hand, “It’s all right,” she said gently, “you’re safe.”

“Keep thinking about the ocean. How big it was and there was this overwhelming feeling that I was going to die-”

“But you _didn’t_ ,” Zoe replied firmly, “your friends got you in time. Hold onto that.”

“Easier said than done,” Magnum closed his eyes, saying, “my mind just won’t stop-”

“Yeah.” Zoe gave his hand another firm squeeze, “I can most definitely relate to that.”

“Supper,” Higgins voice interrupted them and Zoe walked across to take the tray from him.

“Thanks,” she smiled and was about to say _Major_ but thought better of it. “Here,” she said gently, “let’s get you sitting up, Mr Magnum, so you can eat.”

Magnum’s muscles protested as the two nurses helped him to sit up until he was resting against the pillows, Zoe thanked them and then set the sandwich in front of him. “Slowly,” she advised as Magnum bit into the bread, “I know you’re ravenous but take it slow.”

“Easy for you to say,” Magnum mumbled round to sandwich, “feel like I haven’t eaten in weeks.”

Zoe laughed, “Surely not that bad Mr Magnum. If you eat too fast you’ll give yourself indigestion!”

“Hah,” Magnum replied, but he forced himself to eat slower watching Zoe eat her own supper. When the plates had been cleared away and they were sipping their coffee, Magnum lay back against the pillows and sighed, “I can’t tell you how grateful I was. I wouldn’t have made it-”

Zoe laid a cool hand on his arm, “Your friends knew something was wrong. I was a small cog in a larger wheel.”

“What about my Dad?” Magnum asked, his eyes holding hers. “Most people would say it was just my brain trying to cope with the horror of the situation.”

“Yes, they would.” Zoe agreed, “however, I remember a time when I felt the same thing. You see, Mr Magnum, I too served in Vietnam.” She sighed, “four months a nurse before I was sent out. No experience of trauma nursing, I was as green as they come.”

“Where we you stationed?” Magnum asked.

“A makeshift hospital near Pleiku,” Zoe replied, “one night we got word that the Viet Cong were going to overrun our position and we had to get the wounded soldiers out. I stepped out of the Hospital tent to check how evacuation efforts are going when this kid stepped out of the jungle holding of all things a bow and arrow. He could only have been about fourteen or fifteen.I remember thinking as he raised it to his shoulder and fired how utterly stupid it was that I was going to be killed by a _bow and arrow_ in the middle of all this state-of-the-art weaponry.”

“But he didn’t kill you,” Magnum interjected.

“No, but he shot me,” Zoe replied, “Christ it hurt. I fell backwards and I thought he was going to finish me off, and he did come over and kick my left leg – I think thought he’d killed me because there was no reaction. Then I heard him moving away, I couldn’t even speak, it wasn’t just the pain it was feeling the blood pumping out my shoulder and I fancied I could feel it soaking into the dirt taking my life with it. I don’t know how long I lay staring up at the sky and then I swear I heard my father speaking to me, he was telling me I couldn’t lie my six all night, that I needed to get up and get moving.”

“Your father was Navy?” Magnum interjected.

“Yes. Not a SEAL like you, just an ordinary naval officer. He died the year before I was posted to Vietnam.”

“I’m sorry,” Magnum replied, he closed his eyes. “Gods, I’m tired.”

“My story can wait a couple of days-”

“Please,” Magnum grasped a hand, “I’d like to feel that I wasn’t crazy – that I did experience something out there-”

“All right,” Zoe replied guardedly, “but afterwards you must try to sleep. Understand?”

Magnum nodded. If he was honest, everything was beginning to catch up with him, “Yeah. I understand.”

Zoe smiled and squeezed his hand again, “At first I argued with him. I said that he was crazy and I could barely move, let alone stand up. But it wouldn’t quit; so eventually I struggled up on my hands and knees, I remember looking down and seeing the arrow shaft. I think I may have vomited at that point.” Zoe took another sip of coffee and continued, “and throughout it all I could hear my father’s voice, urging me on. I must’ve walked six klicks with an arrow in my shoulder, and how I did it I’ll never know, but I suddenly stumbled straight into a small GI Encampment. And I swear that the last thing I heard before the sentry challenged me was my father’s voice saying, ‘You’ll be all right now.’ I don’t know who was more shocked, them or me.” She laughed softly and then looked at Magnum’s face. His eyes were closed and she realised he’d fallen asleep. Laying his hand on the duvet, Zoe stood up and dimmed the lamp. Quietly she exited the room only to come face-to-face with Higgins and the dogs, “How is he?” Higgins asked.

“Exhausted.” Zoe confirmed, “can you be discreet, Major?”

“I think so,” Higgins replied, “is Magnum more seriously injured than we first presumed?”

“No – oh no,” Zoe responded, “are you aware of something called Third Man Syndrome?”

Higgins frowned, “The belief that in a life-threatening situation you are _not_ alone, that there is someone else with you. Is that what Magnum believes?”

“He is convinced that his father was with him when he was out on the ocean,” Zoe explained. “And I am _not_ about disabuse him of that notion.”

“You think his father _could_ have been with him?” Higgins asked.

“I don’t know that he was,” Zoe replied, “but I don’t know that he wasn’t. I too had a similar experience many years ago. As Shakespeare wrote-”

“There are more things in Heaven and earth, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.” Higgins smiled, “I will say nothing, Dr Walker.”

“Thank you, Sir,” Zoe replied.

“I too have experienced this phenomenon,” Higgins said slowly, “I would _not_ dismiss, nor denigrate Mr Magnum’s feelings or beliefs.”

Almost without thinking Zoe flung her arms around the smaller man and hugged him fiercely. “Thank you,” she murmured, her eyes filling with tears.

“My pleasure, Zoe,” Higgins replied, his embrace as tight as hers.

They finally released one another, their eyes suspiciously bright, and then Higgins cleared his throat and said, “I think you and I deserve a nightcap, don’t you, Captain Walker?”

“That sounds marvellous, Major,” Zoe replied, she looked down at the two dogs flanking them and asked, “shall we take with the dogs with us or leave them on guard?”

“One of the servants is due to take them out on patrol now,” Higgins remarked, and then smiled as a tall, grey-haired man strode into the room. Almost instantly both dogs had bounded across to him their stubby tails wagging furiously.

“I’ll leave the lads in your charge, Mark,” Higgins smiled.

“They like you,” Zoe smiled.

“The lads like everyone,” Higgins replied, “even Magnum now.”

“I’ll bring them back in a couple of hours,” Mark promised.

“See you later,” Zoe replied and then she and Higgins were alone.

“What would you like?” Higgins asked solicitously, as he showed her through to his study. “Brandy, whisky?”


	3. Coming To Terms With Demons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Magnum experiences nightmares from being capsized on the ocean, but Zoe is there to comfort him and to assure him that he is not losing his sanity.

Coming To Terms With Demons

“Actually, I think I’d prefer a mug of cocoa,” Zoe replied. “I really don’t feel like anything alcoholic yet.”

“Fair enough,” Higgins smiled tautly, “but you won’t begrudge me having a glass of whisky.”

“Of course not!” Zoe laughed, “I just don’t think I could stomach anything alcoholic tonight.”

“I understand,” Higgins replied. Their drinks arrived and she sagged back in her chair running a hand across her face. Raising her eyes from their contemplation of her drink she sighed heavily, “it’s been a hard couple of days.”

“You can say that again,” Higgins sipped his whisky, “Magnum must’ve been out there for almost twenty-four hours. How he held on-”

“We’ve been through this,” Zoe replied, “do I have to counsel you too?”

Higgins smiled tersely, “Does it show?”

“A bit,” Zoe replied, “can I tell you what I told Mr Magnum? You sensed that something was wrong and you got to him in time. Hold onto that-”

“But what if-” Higgins began.

“No. Don’t play the ‘What if’ game,” Zoe ordered. “Concentrate on what happened. You all saved his life.”

Higgins took another mouthful of his drink inside again, “Hard to do.”

“I know,” Zoe sympathised, “and when the mind starts to wander-”

“Higgins smiled and nodded “I know. But you at least help centre me.”

“It will get better – I promise.” Zoe replied, “it takes time – sometimes the mind can start to act like a hamster on a wheel, going round and round with no end in sight.”

“Yes. As I said, without you here things could have been, I feel much worse. You have helped me and Mr Magnum.”

“Perhaps we help each other,” Zoe reflected. Finishing her drink, she set the mug down on the side table just as there was a yell from upstairs. Both looked one another and then suddenly they were running for the door. The two nurses Higgins had hired were trying to calm a confused and terrified Magnum. “It’s all right,” Zoe said stepping into the room, “you’re all right.”

One of the nurses moved out of the way so that Zoe could sit down on the edge of the bed. Taking one of Magnum’s fists she gently stroked the back of the clenched hand and continued to speak slowly and gently.

Gradually her words penetrated Magnum’s nightmare, the shudders easing and slowly the hand unclenched. Zoe continued to talk, until Magnum croaked, “Zoe? What happened? Dreams-”

“it’s all right,” she soothed, “go back to sleep. I can give you a sedative if you’d like-”

“No-no,” Magnum shook his head, “please-”

“Fair enough,” she squeezed his hand and watched the eyelids flickered as he dropped into sleep. She heard Higgins clear his throat behind “I think I’d better stay here tonight,” she said thoughtfully, “anyone got any spare pyjamas?”

“I’ll ask some of the staff,” Higgins said shortly.

Zoe nodded and then she was alone, watching the man in front of her sleep. Higgins return with a set of pyjamas and Zoe took them gratefully. “They belong to the cook’s sister.”

“Will you thank you for me,” Zoe replied.

“I have already done so,” Higgins replied.

Zoe smiled back at him and then she Magnum alone. Stripping she pulled on the nightclothes and clambered into bed.

_Magnum was lost in the darkness again. He was surrounded by cold, black ocean, gasping for air he fought against freezing blackness that threatened to overwhelm him. Suddenly it seemed he could hear a soft voice speaking out of the darkness “Magnum, it’s all right. You’re safe, you’re safe-”_

Gasping into consciousness, Magnum opened his eyes to stare into the concerned face of Dr Zoe Walker. She gently laid a hand alongside his face, “”Deep breaths,” she urged, “you’re all right. It was a dream-”

“It was a nightmare,” Magnum muttered, closing his eyes. Zoe watched him thoughtfully for a few moments and then his eyes opened again, “Zoe! What are you doing here?”

“You are having nightmares,” Zoe explained gently, “so I thought it best that I stay.”

A soft groan emerged from Magnum’s throat and a wan smile touched the strong lips, “I’m an idiot.” He muttered.

“No,” Zoe assured him, “you’re not.”

Something that could have been half laugh, half sob erupted from his throat, “Then I’m a fool. I’m falling apart.”

“You’ve been through something that would break most people,” Zoe soothed, “you’re _not_ falling apart.”

Magnum closed his eyes and shook his head, “But the nightmares-”

“Are the result of your experience,” Zoe replied, “it is your brain trying to come to terms with it – you most certainly are not an idiot!”

Magnum sighed, “There’s just – just-”

“So many things going through your brain?” Zoe enquired gently, “there are no simple answers, Mr Magnum. And I know from experience that you can never talk with anyone about the complicated ones.”

Suddenly Magnum’s eyes filled with tears and he was hauling her into a fierce embrace. His head fell onto her shoulder and she felt the hot tears scalding her bare skin and the shudders running through the strong, well muscled torso. Gently she stroked the dark hair, wishing she could find the words to comfort this man. Eventually she felt the shivers ease, and Magnum lifted his head to stare into her eyes, “Gods, I don’t know why you women say crying makes you feel better, I feel dreadful.”

Zoe laughed softly and taking Magnum’s face in her hands said, “Go to sleep. I’ll keep the monsters at bay.”

“Promise?” Magnum demanded.

“I promise, Thomas.” Zoe replied, using his first name for only the second time. “Go to sleep.”

A half smile twitched the lips and then the eyelids drifted closed and he was asleep again.

When Higgins entered the bedroom the following morning it was to see them both fast asleep, curled in each other’s arms. Smiling wryly to himself he quietly left the room. An hour later, a yawning and tired looking Zoe wandered onto the patio. “Good morning,” Higgins smiled, “what would you like for breakfast? And would your choice of juice be orange or pineapple?”

“Breakfast? Oh surprise me,” Zoe laughed, “and juice? Definitely pineapple.”

Higgins smiled and Zoe was alone. She was watching the undulation of the ocean when she felt a warm hand on her shoulder and a familiar voice in her ear, “Morning, Beautiful.”

Zoe turned her head to smile up at him, “Morning, Mr Magnum. How do you feel this morning?”

Magnum shrugged, “Better, thanks. And it’s just Magnum.”

“Good.” Zoe saw his lips tighten as he stared out at the ocean. “Come and sit opposite me,” she said firmly.

Magnum ran a trembling hand across his forehead and managed a shaky nod. “Yeah.” He was watching her face when Higgins brought Zoe’s breakfast out. “Magnum!” Higgins said, the delight evident in his voice, “good to see you up and about. How do you feel?”

“Stiff,” Magnum grumbled, a wry smile lighting up the dark eyes, “I owe you one, Higgins.”

“It was a combined effort,” Higgins replied.

Magnum nodded and some of the dark shadows in his eyes seemed to lift. “I owe Rick and T. C. too I think.”

“You would have done – have done – the same for them,” Zoe replied firmly, “which reminds me, I need to let them know you’re recovering.”

Magnum nodded again and ran a hand across his face, “The last time I ached this badly was the first time I ran a marathon. I was so stiff-”

“Where did you place?” Zoe enquired, a smile lighting her whole face.

“Ninety-fifth out of three hundred,” Magnum replied “I was all right during the run, but the following day I was sore in places I didn’t think you could get sore.”

Zoe bit back a grin, “And you a Navy SEAL! How do you feel in yourself?”

Magnum waited until Higgins was out of earshot and then he said, “A bit shaky if you must know.”

“Yeah I do.” Zoe responded softly. “It will get better, Mr Magnum. I promise.”

“Not going to refer me to a shrink them?” Magnum grumbled.

“Not unless you think you need one, and I’m not sure you do. Do you think you need a Psychiatrist?”

Magnum scowled and Zoe laughed, “I’ll take that as a ‘No’ then.”

Magnum nodded, the relief evident in his face. “Thanks,” he muttered thickly.

Zoe finished her coffee and then turned to Higgins, “Might I use your telephone, Sir?”

“Certainly, Dr Walker,” Higgins replied.

“Thanks”, Zoe replied, “and then I must get back to the hospital.”

Magnum rose to his feet, “Dr Walker – Zoe, I haven’t the words-”

Gently she laid a cool hand on his arm, “It wasn’t just me. Remember that.”

Suddenly she was enfolded in strong, warm arms, “If you ever need my help, just call.”

Zoe returned the hug and then stared up into the dark brown eyes, “I will, Mr Magnum.” She released him and then slinging her handbag over her shoulder, quietly left the house.

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own Magnum PI, which is owned by Belisarius Productions, Glen A. Larson Productions & Universal Television.


End file.
